|Picture yourself here|
My fifteenth year was spent in a room much like any other high school classroom, sitting by the window to make my daydreaming extra pleasant. I sang the words to Bon Jovi in my head, tried to slide under the bullies' radars, and was sure I knew more than the teachers I endured.
My homeroom teacher had a perfect white bob, long skirts and a soft voice. She was quite lovely in hindsight and loved to teach her class how to meditate. "Close your eyes," she'd whisper, and I'd stare at her. "Uncross your legs and your arms." I'd cross my limbs defiantly. In between her relaxing chants to the other girls she'd silently gesture to me to do what I was told, her calm voice at battle with her frustrated eyes. I loved torturing her, knowing she couldn't tell me off right then.
I thought meditation was stupid and dumb and a waste of time. "Reeeeeeellllaaaaaaaxxxxxxx," I'd laugh after class. "She is, like, SUCH a loser."
My hairdresser likes to think he's my counsellor, always tells me how much I need to stop worrying and stressing out. I don't even tell him I'm worried or stressed, he just assumes I am. Maybe I have that look about me. I went in for a haircut last week and he told me I should start meditating.
"Just half an hour a day," he said. "I get up half an hour earlier every morning - so, at 7am I'm up and focusing and breathing and..." Here's where I stopped listening and started concentrating really hard on not laughing. 7am! Haha! I bit my tongue to stop myself from saying, "Mate, if I got up half an hour earlier I'd be up at 4.30am. Not going to happen."
I've heard meditation can be as useful as sleep, but, well, I'd still rather sleep when I can.
I know I could find time to meditate if I really wanted to (maybe at night when the kids are asleep), and I know it might even do me some good. But I think if I hear someone telling me to relax I'll glare at them with the anger of my fifteen-year-old self - or even do something more violent.
Perhaps I should just stick to walking out my stress. Or sleeping.
Do you meditate? How do you deal with people telling you to "Just relax"?